Why We Do the Things We Do
Connie Tyne

What drives our actions? Why are so many of us out of shape, overweight, and looking older than our years? Why do we continue to put ourselves at risk for heart disease and diabetes? When our social and political leaders, our physicians and nurses, our clergy, and our parents provide unhealthy role-models, it's no wonder we have a less than ideal version of "normal" as our blueprints for life.

When you think about it, most of us operate on a kind of "automatic pilot" that moves us efficiently through our daily routines. We get up at the same time, drive the same routes, order the same items off menus, and vacation at familiar places.

Research suggests that we do the things we do based on habit, internal psychological norms, and outside influences. If we can pinpoint our own driving forces, we might just be able to modify them.

Habits change as we age but they are clearly influenced by early role models and the culture of our families of origin. Enjoying a seafood-based diet, being a meat-and-potatoes guy, or wrapping your favorite foods in a warm tortilla are examples of what seems "normal" depending on where you're from. To implement lifestyle or nutrition changes that will last, it's best to work within your norm and avoid drastic measures that are not reasonable.

Simply moving from fried foods to baked or grilled choices can have a major impact on your overall health. Replacing alcohol, caffeine, or soft drinks with water or herbal teas reduces calories, stress, and cravings. Adding one additional fruit and vegetable to your daily diet is a great beginning and one that peers may eventually support. As you begin to look and feel better, family and friends will follow your lead if it seems simple and almost normal.

Long-term successful changes also require a buy in from our sub-conscious mind. When we define ourselves physically, our sub-conscious mind works behind the scenes to make it happen. That is why it's so dangerous to think of yourself as pudgy, impulsive, lazy, or forgetful. That is also why motivational speakers suggest we adopt positive affirming statements like "I'm becoming healthier every day" as a part of the successful change model. Never underestimate the power of your conscious and subconscious self-talk to create a new version of normal for yourself.

We train our children and pets with positive affirmations and minimal punishment and yet we are often very cruel to ourselves. Disheartening criticism can sound like a demanding parent, a relentless coach, or a nagging spouse. Not very motivating. Say "No!" to that voice and replace it with optimism and encouragement that makes you feel powerful and in control. My favorite is "progress, not perfection." I remind myself often that "success is the progressive realization of a worthwhile ideal" (Earl Nightingale). You are a successful person as soon as you begin making healthy choices. If you will over-celebrate and under-criticize you will actually enjoy the journey.

The final and most diabolical influence on what we do comes from somewhere between Madison Ave. and Hollywood. Billboards, ads, and commercials bombard us with images of beautiful people having a blast. We get the impression that the more we eat and drink the better our lives will be. Let me remind you that the models in those ads don't actually eat, drink, or live the way they are portrayed. If they did they wouldn't look the way they do.

Television programs and movies create images and ideals that contain just enough reality for us to identify with the characters on some basis. It's amazing how influential these characters are as we make decisions to cut our hair, shorten our skirts, get a new job and even name our children. It has been well documented that smoking increases when celebrities are shown smoking. If you don't feel a little bit manipulated, you should!

No one tempts us with more advertising than the food and beverage industry.. In Erick Schlosser's best-seller Fast Food Nation (Perennial Pub., 2002), we read that half of the money Americans spend on food is spent at restaurants, mostly the fast-food variety. The enticements are working so well that on any given day 25 percent of adults give in to the urge to choose fast food. When is the last time you were watching television and had a craving for apples or broccoli? My family wants pizza, burgers, or fried chicken.

To counter the constant bombardment from ads, arm yourself with humor and a few little "truths." You are not a follower, not a sheep, not a victim. You will not choose low quality, unhealthy foods for yourself or your family. There are many choices. You will plan ahead for snacks and meals that are good tasting and good for you and just say "no" to restaurants that offer too few high quality choices. My family teased me for a while but I'm a big girl, I can take it. Now they know I'll go to Subway but not Catfish Cabin. I'll order a mushroom or Canadian bacon pizza instead of sausage or pepperoni. Yes, some have tried to sabotage my plan but I take that as a challenge. So can you.

Let's wake up and resist the seen and unseen forces that work against us. Get off auto-pilot and become a role model within your familiar, normal life. Begin by visualizing the strong, healthy person you are becoming and encouraging yourself every step of the way. Finally, join me and get a good laugh at the ridiculous glorification of food and the hopelessly skinny people who eat it on TV!

Connie Tyne, L.M.S.W., is executive director of Cooper Wellness Program which offers 4, 6, or 13-day medically-based lifestyle enhancement programs where participants learn the tools necessary to improve fitness levels, eat nutritionally, lose weight, and reduce stress. For more information, call 800-444-5192.

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